Is social media to blame for loneliness?

There are plenty of great things about social media. You can connect with old friends, see what your long-distance relatives are up to, learn something new, or simply be entertained. But social media can also have its downsides. 

While we might use social media to feel connected, it can have an opposite effect. Research shows that too much time on social media can increase loneliness, and experts recommend limiting use to 30 minutes per day.     

Does social media make you more or less lonely?

The relationship between social media and loneliness can seem counterintuitive. After all, there’s a reason it’s called “social” media. Many people use these platforms to build community, share experiences, and talk to their friends. So, on the surface, it seems like social media could be the anecdote to loneliness and isolation. However, it appears that the reverse is true. 

One recent study found that the more time a person spends on social media, the more alone they’re likely to feel. It also appears that the reasons someone uses social media can affect their level of loneliness. 

People who log on with the goal of maintaining existing friendships report more loneliness than people who use these platforms for other reasons. Researchers hypothesize this is because, while social media can facilitate some forms of connection, it doesn’t have the same impact as real-life relationships.

How do loneliness and social media impact your mental health?

Almost everyone will experience loneliness at some point. But when it’s severe and ongoing, it can seriously affect your mental health. It appears that social media-induced loneliness may be more prevalent among people who spend more than three hours per day on these platforms. 

In addition, people who use social media excessively may be more likely to experience depression, anxiety, and suicidal ideation.* They may also experience a decline in real-life friendships and family communication, which may increase their sense of isolation.

*A note on safety: If you’re having thoughts of harming yourself, don’t hesitate to ask for help. You can contact the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988 from any phone. Their counselors will provide confidential support and resources to help keep you safe.

Swapping social media for true connection

There are some important differences between the friendships we form in real life and the connections we experience online, especially with influencers and celebrities. Research shows that our brains respond differently to these two forms of connection, and this might help explain why a person could have thousands of “friends” on social media but still feel lonely in real life. 

If you’re looking to spend less time on social media and focus on building in-person connections, some strategies that can help include:

• Take a break. Whether it’s for a weekend, a month, or an afternoon, try taking a social media break. You can use the time you’d have spent on Facebook, TikTok, Instagram, or other platforms to do some self-care, visit a friend, or cross a few things off of your to-do list.
• Set limits. Research shows that spending less time on social media can significantly increase your well-being. Pay attention to how much time you spend on social media, and consider creating a plan to limit your consumption. 
• Track your mood. Even if it’s just for a few days, note how you feel after spending time on social media. These insights may motivate you to rethink your relationships with the people you follow or engage with on social media.
• Tend to your real-life relationships. When life gets busy, it can feel easier to send a direct message than to schedule a coffee with a friend. But making an effort to prioritize in-person connections can help you feel less alone and foster stronger relationships. 
• Look for alternatives. If you tend to sign onto social media when you’re feeling lonely, consider what else you could do when those feelings come up. Maybe it’s going for a walk, journaling, doing a hobby, or calling a loved one.
• Ask for help. If you’re struggling with social media and loneliness, know that it’s OK to ask for help. A therapist can help you explore the reasons for your social media use, address unhelpful patterns, improve your social skills, and support you in building meaningful relationships in real life.

Find care with Rula

It might seem ironic that a platform designed to increase connection can lead to loneliness. But it turns out that spending too much time on social media can take a toll on your mental health and decrease formation of meaningful, authentic connections in person. If your social media use is making you feel isolated, know that with the right support you can reduce your time spent online, feel less alone, and learn to nurture real-life relationships. 

No matter the mental health concern you’re facing, with Rula, help is just a few clicks away. Whether you’re struggling with loneliness or another issue, you can use our therapist-matching program to find a provider that’s right for you and your needs. And thanks to our extensive network of over 10,000 mental health professionals, you won’t have to wait weeks or months for an appointment. You can start the process today, find a therapist who takes your insurance, and book your first live video session for as soon as tomorrow. 

Find a therapist with Rula