What is self-destructive behavior?

We all do things that aren’t in our best interest once in a while. But when this behavior is persistent and severe, it may indicate the presence of an underlying mental health concern. Broadly speaking, self-destructive behavior is any purposeful action that results in personal harm. It can include anything from risky behaviors (like speeding or intentionally cutting youself) to attempting suicide. It can also involve acts of emotional self-destruction, like sabotaging your relationships, financial stability, or career opportunities. 

It would be difficult to estimate the exact number of people who exhibit self-destructive behavior. But research suggests that it’s highly common among certain populations. For example, one study found that 53% of people with borderline personality disorder (BPD) engage in non-suicidal self-injury (like cutting), and 76% attempt suicide. Another study found that 20% of school-aged children experience self-destructive thoughts and behaviors by early adolescence. 

The prevalence of self-destructive behavior among these distinct populations suggests that it can affect people of all ages and backgrounds. Learning more about this complex topic can help ensure that you get the support you need to regulate your behavior and strengthen your mental health.

What are examples of self-destructive behavior?

Self-destructive behavior can take many forms. It can lead to health problems and bodily harm, interpersonal challenges, and legal trouble. In severe cases, it can even be life threatening. 

Some of the most common examples of self-destructive behavior include:

• Harmful substance use
• Self-harm (cutting, burning, scratching, etc.)
• Disordered eating
• Risky behaviors (like reckless driving or having unprotected sex)
• Impulsive behaviors (like overspending or gambling more than intended)
• Neglect of hygiene or other forms of self-care
• Intentionally not taking safety precautions (like not wearing a helmet or seatbelt)
• Procrastination or not doing what’s required at school or work, despite knowing the consequences
• Not paying bills despite having the financial means to do so
• Not attending necessary medical or mental health appointments
• Not taking prescribed medication as directed
• Ending relationships with a partner or loved one without reason 
• Isolating yourself from friends or family
• Suicide attempts*

*A note on safety: If you’re having thoughts of harming yourself, don’t hesitate to ask for help. You can contact the National Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988 from any phone. Their counselors will provide confidential support and resources to help keep you safe. 

What are the reasons for self-destructive behavior?

There are different reasons why someone might engage in self-destructive behavior. But, for many people, it comes from a desire to release or avoid uncomfortable emotions or feel in control. In addition, one study found that some people engage in self-destructive behavior as a means of self-punishment, to feel “real” or present, to communicate their suffering to others, or to prevent themselves from attempting suicide.

Research also shows that people who engage in self-destructive behavior often have a history of adverse childhood experiences. Specifically, childhood sexual and physical abuse are some of the strongest predictors of the most severe forms of self-destructive behavior. 

Can a mental health condition cause self-destructive behavior?

On its own, self-destructive behavior is not a diagnosis. However, it’s known to accompany various mental health conditions. People living with certain conditions sometimes use self-destructive behavior as a way to cope with psychological suffering or emotional pain. 

These conditions include:

• Borderline personality disorder (BPD)
• Depression
• Anxiety
• Substance use disorder (SUD)
• Eating disorders 
• Post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)

Address self-destructive behavior with professional support

If you’re having trouble managing your behavior and it’s negatively affecting your well-being, relationships, or ability to function, help is available. There are mental health professionals who can help you cultivate self-compassion and interrupt the cycle of self-destructive behavior. 

A therapist will listen to your concerns, ask questions about your history and symptoms, and ensure that you receive an accurate diagnosis. From there, you can work together to create a treatment plan that reflects your individual strengths and areas of need.

Some of the most effective treatments for reducing self-destructive behavior include cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and dialectical behavioral therapy (DBT). One of the main goals of CBT is to interrupt the negative thought patterns that may be contributing to unhealthy behavior. It can also help you adopt healthier coping skills and learn new ways to manage stress. DBT addresses self-destructive behavior by focusing on emotional regulation, mindfulness, distress tolerance, and relationship strengthening. You and your therapist can decide on the best approach for your specific needs.

While there are no medications for self-destructive behaviors, there are medications that can be helpful for anxiety, depression, or other mental health conditions. If you have a mental health condition, you can always talk to your provider about whether medication could have a positive impact on your mental health.

Coping strategies for dealing with self-destructive behavior

While not a replacement for professional help, there are some self-help strategies that can help you reduce and prevent self-destructive behavior.

• Increase your self-awareness. Being able to identify your self-destructive tendencies is one of the first steps in reducing them.
• Practice mindfulness. Research shows that mindfulness can support emotional regulation and reduce self-destructive behaviors. Pause, take a deep breath, and see if you can notice — without judgment — what’s happening in your mind, body, and environment. 
• Care for your body. Eating a balanced diet, getting adequate rest, and making time for movement you enjoy aren’t just good for your physical well-being — they can strengthen your mental health too.
• Be kind to yourself. Remind yourself that self-destructive behavior is often a means of releasing emotional pain. So be gentle with yourself as you work to interrupt unhealthy patterns.

Find care with Rula

Self-destructive behavior involves any intentional action that results in personal harm. It can include anything from procrastination or reckless driving to cutting or other forms of self-harm. While anyone can engage in self-destructive behavior, when it’s severe and chronic, it could be a sign of an underlying mental health condition. And, in some cases, self-destructive behavior can be life threatening. If you or someone you love is dealing with self-destructive behavior, one of the best things you can do is seek professional help.

At Rula, we believe that everyone deserves affordable, effective mental healthcare. With a network of over 10,000 providers to choose from, you can quickly and easily find a therapist who takes your insurance and can start providing support as soon as tomorrow.

Find support with Rula