How to set New Year’s resolutions that support mental health

Setting New Year’s resolutions has become a tradition for millions of people around the world. According to the Pew Research Center, around one-third of U.S. adults — and nearly half of young adults aged 18 to 29 — make at least one New Year’s resolution.

The start of a new year feels like a chance to turn the page, let go of what didn’t work, and focus on self-improvement. However, if you don’t go about your New Year’s goals with self-compassion, they can also lead to perfectionism and pressure. 

Why New Year’s resolutions are appealing

It’s understandable why so many people choose to make new goals around the New Year. Jan. 1 can feel like a fresh start. Although we can begin working toward our goals at any time, having a clear start and finish line like the first of the year can give us an extra push of motivation.

The media also plays a role for many people. We might be bombarded with advertisements for gym memberships or weight loss medications. We might be seeing social media posts from loved ones or influencers talking about the goals they want to set in the New Year. This social pressure can contribute to a sense that we’re not making the most of our lives if we’re not setting New Year’s resolutions.

People make New Year’s resolutions for many different reasons. Reports show that some of the most common goals include:

• Lose weight
• Exercise more
• Improve finances
• Meditate
• Spend more time on hobbies

Are New Year’s resolutions good for mental health?

New Year’s resolutions aren’t, in and of themselves, good or bad for mental health. It’s all about how you approach them and the factors that lead you to make them.

Some research suggests that setting meaningful personal goals is an important part of wellbeing. This doesn’t necessarily mean you need to set New Year’s resolutions, but having a sense that you’re working toward something can help you build confidence and mastery over skills. These resolutions can also help you evaluate your life and make sure you’re living in accordance with your values.

You can also set New Year’s resolutions that are specific to improving your mental health. For example, you might make resolutions to stick to therapy for at least six months or write in your gratitude journal every day. Physical health resolutions can also play a role. For example, getting regular physical exercise has been shown to be one of the best things you can do for your overall mental health.

While it’s generally a positive thing to set goals, it’s important to make them in a certain way to avoid disappointment, perfectionism, and self-criticism. Many people set resolutions they can’t or don’t want to stick to without thinking about the underlying values and motivators. It can be damaging to your mental health to blame or judge yourself for not being able to meet these unrealistic goals.

It’s important to practice self-compassion both when you’re setting your goals and when you’re working toward them. Set realistic goals and don’t be afraid to reevaluate your goals during the year. If the goals are no longer working for you, or if you find you’re feeling more pressured than motivated, it’s completely OK to set smaller goals even after the New Year. This doesn’t mean that you’ve failed. It simply means you want to set goals that support your mental health.

Embracing the new year, with or without resolutions

The New Year can be a great opportunity to reevaluate your life and set new directions, but you don’t need to necessarily set goals right as the New Year starts. Even if resolutions aren’t your thing, you can still take the opportunity of the New Year to evaluate your life and realign yourself to your values. 

Consider these tips.

Think about what matters to you 

Don’t make New Year’s resolutions just to make them. The most effective resolutions — whether they’re made in the New Year or not — help you to live a life more aligned with your values. 

Reflect on what’s most important to you. Does the way you currently live your life reflect these values? What needs to change for you to be able to live these values more fully in your life? When you set goals that are designed to help you get more aligned with your values, you may be more motivated to stick to them.

Reflect on progress

The New Year isn’t just about where you want to go — it’s also about how far you’ve come already. Reflect on the year that just ended and think about what went well. You may not have met every single one of your goals, but you likely took at least some small steps toward them. 

What were you most proud of yourself for last year? What progress did you make? Reflecting and celebrating your growth can boost your motivation for the future.

Remove obstacles

Think about what may have held you back from meeting your goals in the past and make a plan for overcoming these obstacles moving forward.

For example, maybe you set a goal to exercise at home but found it difficult to get motivated without going to the gym. Or maybe you wanted to commit to going to therapy but weren’t able to find a provider who could meet with you at a convenient time. Making a plan to approach these obstacles differently this year will improve your chances of building lasting habits. 

Move toward, not away from

A large study showed that people are more likely to stick with approach-oriented goals — including more of something you love in your life — than avoidance-oriented goals, or trying to cut something negative out. It may be helpful to think about how you frame your goals. For example, instead of setting the goal of “stop being mean to yourself,” make it a point to practice positive self-talk every day.

By setting approach-oriented goals, you’re adding to your life instead of taking away from it. This supports self-compassion — these resolutions are about self-empowerment, not self-punishment.

Work with a therapist

Setting goals can sometimes bring up feelings of anxiety, self-doubt, or perfectionism. If you’re struggling to identify realistic goals or are overwhelmed by the pressure to change, therapy can help.

A therapist can provide a safe, supportive space to explore your values and clarify what matters most to you. They can also help you reframe unhelpful thought patterns that might be holding you back and support you in building a life that feels more aligned with your goals.

Therapy is a space where you can explore your hopes and challenges without judgment. Whether you’re setting resolutions or simply reflecting on your values, therapy can help you gain clarity, set realistic goals, and approach the New Year with self-compassion and confidence.

Find care with Rula

Whether you want to make New Year’s resolutions or not, therapy can help you move forward with intention and make lasting positive changes. Rula has connected patients and therapists for millions of successful therapy sessions. 

Find a therapist with Rula