Understanding false memory OCD

Imagine you’re running late to catch a flight. You rush to check your bag and board the plane. Later, when you get to your destination, you realize you forgot to pack your medication. But you could have sworn you put it in your toiletry bag.

In this example, packing your medication could be considered a “false” memory. You can vividly picture something that never happened. Most people have had a similar experience. It typically occurs when you’re in a rush or when your mind is occupied with many different things. Most people can shrug it off and move on. But this is not the case for people with false memory OCD. People living with this presentation of OCD are consumed by questions about the validity of their memories. They live in a cycle of worry about whether something harmful or upsetting happened in the past. 

What is false memory OCD?

You cannot be officially diagnosed with false memory OCD because it is not a recognized mental health condition. Rather, it’s an unofficial OCD subtype. People use this term to describe the experience of someone whose OCD symptoms cause them to question the truth of their memories. 

There are as many different presentations of OCD as there are people living with the condition. Yet everyone with OCD has one thing in common. They all experience unwanted intrusive thoughts called “obsessions” and resulting unwanted, repetitive behaviors called “compulsions.” 

Many people with OCD have obsessive thoughts related to fears about what could happen. For example, they may worry about getting hurt if they leave their house. So they engage in compulsions, like taking extreme safety precautions, in an attempt to lessen those worries. 

But for people living with false memory OCD, their obsessions, compulsions, and other OCD symptoms revolve around what they fear did happen. They might find it difficult to tell the difference between upsetting, intrusive thoughts and actual memories of real events. 

Examples of false memory OCD

Every person living with false memory OCD will have their own unique experience of the condition. However, this particular presentation of OCD tends to fixate on immoral, harmful, or sexually inappropriate acts. Some examples of this include:

False memory OCD obsessions

• After giving your child a bath, you suddenly wonder if you touched them inappropriately.
• You recall getting into a fight with your partner early in the relationship and now wonder if it’s because they physically assaulted you.
• Upon leaving a public restroom, you question whether or not you tried to look through the crack in the stall door at the person next to you.
• When you get home after a work trip, you wonder if you cheated on your partner with a colleague.
• You used to think you had a happy childhood. But lately, you’ve been wondering if the images of abuse that keep flashing into your mind are real.

It’s important to note that these memories, while disturbing, do not reflect actual events. People living with false memory OCD worry that upsetting things occurred even when there is no evidence to suggest that they did.

False memory OCD compulsions

• Playing the upsetting memory over and over again in your mind to “prove” it didn’t really happen
• Attempting to reenact the situation to test whether or not the memory is valid
• Making choices or acting on the premise that the memory is real
• Researching people, places, or things related to the memory to look for evidence that it occurred
• Seeking constant reassurance from others that the memory is false
• Warning other people about something that may have happened (when if you have no evidence that it did)

Common symptoms of false memory OCD

Like other forms of OCD, there are some common signs and symptoms associated with false memory OCD, including:

• Having an inability to control one’s obsessive thoughts and compulsive behaviors, even when they negatively impact your life
• Spending an excessive amount of time thinking about the validity of your memories (usually at least one hour per day or more)
• Being unable to find pleasure in the things you used to enjoy
• Having a co-occurring mood disorder like anxiety or depression
• Engaging in unhealthy substance use (as an attempt to self-medicate)
• Experiencing a worsening of symptoms over time

What causes false memory OCD?

Like other presentations of OCD, false memory OCD cannot be attributed to a single cause. However, researchers have identified some factors that may increase your risk for developing clinical OCD, including:

• Having a close relative who also lives with OCD or other mental health conditions
• Being someone who is naturally very meticulous, neat, or detail-oriented (in ways that are unhelpful)
• Possessing an abnormality in the area of the brain that is responsible for regulating serotonin 
• Experiencing trauma 
• Feeling frequently anxious or responsible for others from an early age

How is false memory OCD treated?

Since false memory OCD is not a recognized mental health condition, there is limited research on the recommended treatment for this presentation of symptoms. However, the following interventions are frequently used to treat clinical OCD:

• Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT): CBT is a form of talk therapy that helps people uncover and challenge intrusive thoughts — including false memories — and change the way they respond to anxiety and stress. 
• Exposure and response prevention (ERP): ERP is a subtype of CBT. It involves a safe, gradual exposure to a person’s triggers. It can help people learn to accept and live with uncertainty around their memories.
• Medication: Certain prescription medications, like selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), can help control OCD symptoms. You can ask your doctor or psychiatrist if this form of treatment is right for you.
• Self-help strategies: While not a replacement for professional help, a self-care routine can support your mental and physical health as you work on improving your mental well-being. For example, practice mindfulness, surround yourself with supportive friends and family, and make time for activities you enjoy. 

Find a therapist with Rula

If you’re having trouble trusting your recollection of distressing events and it’s negatively impacting your life, you might be living with false memory OCD. And while not an official diagnosis, this presentation of OCD symptoms can take a toll on your mental health. Fortunately, no matter what form of OCD you’re living with, help is available. 

At Rula, we can connect you with a therapist who specializes in treating OCD or any other mental health condition in just a few minutes. Our extensive network means you can find a provider who takes your insurance and start meeting with them online as soon as tomorrow. Plus, if medication ends up being part of your treatment plan, we can connect you to those services as well. 

Find care with Rula