What is emotionally focused therapy (EFT)?

Emotionally focused therapy (EFT) is an evidence-based modality that’s been used to treat a variety of mental health concerns. EFT focuses on exploring and processing emotions to create positive change. 

The goals of EFT are to strengthen one’s sense of self, regulate emotional expression, and find greater meaning in life. It’s frequently used in couples therapy, but individuals and families can benefit from EFT as well.

How emotionally focused therapy works

EFT operates on a few basic assumptions, including:

• Our emotions are heavily influenced by both our internal and external experiences. 
• Uncovering and exploring emotion in therapy helps us better understand ourselves.
• We can create lasting change and shift our perspectives by examining our subjective internal experiences (a process also referred to as making new meaning).

In addition to these core assumptions, EFT practitioners rely on two primary mechanisms to help clients meet their goals. These include building a strong therapeutic relationship and focusing on the emotions that surround a person’s challenges. Here’s how these mechanisms shape EFT sessions:

• The EFT therapist and client will work together to decide what they want to cover in a session. Collaboration is an important part of a strong therapeutic relationship.
• Throughout the conversation, the EFT therapist will respond with empathy to the struggles or painful experiences their client shares.
• Using a strengths-based perspective, the EFT therapist will highlight anything the client is already doing to manage their challenges in healthy ways (e.g., naming emotions, accessing existing resources, etc.).
• As the client shares, the EFT therapist will continue to encourage them to focus on and explore whatever feelings come up. They’ll also prompt them to examine the meaning they attach to those feelings. 

These essential processes are used to guide EFT sessions, whether with individuals, couples, or families. However, EFT couples therapy involves three distinct stages. So if you’re considering doing EFT with a partner or partners, here’s how it works:

1. Cycle de-escalation: In this stage, couples work to understand how their current interactions have kept them in a state of conflict and distress. This often includes an examination of each person’s attachment style and role in maintaining the cycle. 
2. Restructuring interactions: Using the insights they gained in stage one, stage two is designed to create new emotional experiences for the couple. By sharing their vulnerabilities and needs with their partner, couples can begin to form a more secure bond. 
3. Consolidation: Once the couple starts to develop a deeper attachment, they can start to improve their relationship functioning and problem-solving skills. During this stage, they may begin to experience less conflict, feel more connected to one another, and improve their overall relationship satisfaction. 

In addition to its efficacy and flexibility, one of the strengths of EFT is that it’s a relatively brief form of care. Couples who engage in EFT can usually move through the three stages in between 8 and 20 sessions,, though this can vary based on their needs. Stage one typically lasts the longest, and about 75% of sessions will be spent on cycle de-escalation.

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Who can benefit from EFT

Research shows that EFT has been successfully used to treat several mental health concerns, including:

• Depression
• Anxiety
• Trauma-related distress
• Eating disorders
• Affective disorders
• Interpersonal difficulties
• Relationship difficulties

Three things to know when starting EFT

If you’re considering EFT, there are a few things to know before you get started. 

1. EFT requires vulnerability. At its core, EFT is about increasing self-acceptance through emotional expression. This process requires a willingness to dive deep into your internal experiences and share them with your therapist (and partner, if you’re doing couples therapy). While this process can be challenging, vulnerability is a critical component of seeing positive change with EFT. 
2. EFT isn’t a fit for everyone (and that’s OK). If EFT seems like it might not be a fit for you, know that you have other options. If you prefer structured, skills-based approaches, therapies like  cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) or solutions-focused therapy may better align with your needs. Your therapist can help determine the right approach for you.
3. EFT providers have specific training. If you’re interested in working with an EFT therapist, it’s important to find a qualified provider. Ask potential providers about their experience with EFT before your first session. If they don’t practice EFT, they may be able to refer you to a therapist who does.

Find care with Rula

EFT is an evidence-based treatment for a variety of mental health concerns. While frequently associated with couples therapy, it can be used in individual and family therapy as well. EFT works by encouraging people to uncover and examine their emotions — especially the feelings connected to their challenges. This process can help you attach new meanings to your experiences, foster greater self-acceptance, and strengthen your bond with the people you love.

At Rula, we’re committed to delivering a comprehensive behavioral health experience that helps people feel seen and understood so they can get back to feeling their best. 

Rula makes it easier to find a licensed therapist or psychiatric provider who accepts your insurance so you don’t have to choose between affordable care and excellent care. With a diverse network of more than 15,000 providers, 24/7 crisis support, and appointments available as soon as tomorrow, we’re here to help you make progress — wherever you are on your mental health journey.

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