What is dependent personality disorder (DPD)?

Dependent personality disorder (DPD) is a mental health condition involving chronic, persistent overreliance on others to meet one’s emotional and practical needs. While it’s one of the more common personality disorders, it’s relatively rare among the general population. Research shows that less than 1% of people in the U.S. are diagnosed with DPD. 

How do you know if you have DPD?

We all have times in our lives when we need to lean on others for help. Having a support system can be an incredible asset when life throws you a curveball. For example, if you break your arm, you might rely on a loved one to drive you to work while you heal. Or maybe you experience a difficult personal loss, and you find yourself needing to talk to your friends more frequently. 

In instances like these, there’s nothing wrong with asking for help. Seeking support as you navigate life’s challenges doesn’t make you unhealthily dependent on others. In fact, it’s one of the healthiest things you can do in hard times. But this is very different from living with DPD.

DPD is a condition that causes an enduring overreliance on others and a pervasive need to be taken care of. People with DPD don’t feel that they can make decisions for themselves or care for themselves. Some people might describe their behavior as “clingy,” and people with DPD are often seen as submissive. 

In addition to an excessive need to be taken care of, a loss of independence, and chronic fears of separation, there are some other things that set DPD apart from a healthy reliance on others. 

To be diagnosed with DPD, a person must exhibit five or more of the following symptoms, typically by early adulthood:

• Inability to make daily decisions without an unreasonable amount of support or reassurance from others
• Inability to take responsibility for most important aspects of life (deferring to others instead)
• Trouble expressing oneself or disagreeing with others due to fears that they might lose support or approval
• Inability to start projects or work independently due to a lack of confidence in their skills, abilities, judgment, etc. (not because they don’t have the energy or desire to do things)
• Willingness to go to extremes, even at their own expense, to get support or approval from others
• Difficulty being alone for fear that they can’t care for themselves
• An urgent need to form a new relationship when one relationship ends
• Chronic, unrealistic fears about being unable to care for oneself

What causes dependent personality disorder?

Like other personality disorders, we aren’t fully sure what causes DPD. But it might be linked to the following risk factors:

• Early experiences: Having parents who were either too controlling and/or overprotective or being rewarded for dependency could diminish one’s ability to be independent.
• Self-concept: Seeing oneself as incapable, helpless, or inadequate could make a person believe they need others’ help to survive.
• Biology: Some children are naturally more sad or fearful, and this temperament might lead to dependency later in life.
• Gender: When traditional gender roles are reinforced, women and people who were assigned female at birth (AFAB) may be expected to be passive and obedient to others.
• Culture: In some cultures, submissiveness and passivity are valued, and this is an important consideration when seeking an evaluation for DPD.

Effects of DPD 

DPD can affect your health and well-being in significant ways. Left untreated, DPD can make it difficult to establish and maintain healthy interpersonal relationships. It can also increase your risk of:

• Co-occurring mental health conditions, like mood disorders, eating disorders, or substance use disorders 
• Staying in unsafe or abusive relationships
• Self-harm and suicidality*
• Physical health problems

*The 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline provides 24/7, confidential support with trained crisis counselors. If you or a loved one is in emotional distress or a suicidal crisis, please call or text 988. If you’re experiencing a life-threatening emergency or need immediate help, please call 911.

How is dependent personality disorder treated?

You can manage your DPD symptoms with ongoing professional help. One of the positive aspects of DPD is that it might actually help facilitate treatment. People with DPD are often eager to please, so they may be more likely to attend therapy and follow their provider’s advice. However, this can be a delicate balance, as DPD can also make it difficult to have healthy boundaries with your therapist. 

There’s limited research on the best therapies for DPD. But experts believe that psychodynamic therapy may help people with DPD manage stress and improve social skills. In addition, cognitive therapies can help people with DPD interrupt unhelpful thought patterns, improve self-esteem and relationship skills, and reduce dependency on others. 

While no medications are approved for DPD specifically, they can be used to address symptoms of co-occurring conditions, like depression or anxiety. You can talk to your provider if you’re interested in including medication in your DPD treatment plan.

Find care with Rula

We all need support sometimes. It’s OK to lean on your friends and loved ones during difficult seasons. But if you’re struggling to care for yourself or do basic daily tasks without help or approval from someone else, it could be a sign of DPD. Fortunately, with the right support, you can increase your independence, improve your mental well-being, and learn to form healthy, balanced relationships.

If you think you might be living with DPD or another mental health condition, Rula can help you quickly and easily connect with a therapist. In just a few minutes, you can use our therapist-matching program to connect with a provider who takes your insurance. And with over 10,000 mental health professionals in our network, you can find the right provider for your needs and schedule your first live-video session for as soon as tomorrow.

Find a therapist with Rula